Finding Your Style
I’ve been experimenting with my style since middle school. Though I’ll admit, through high school, I mostly wore what I felt comfortable in and what was trending. I gained an early sense of fashion from my mom. When we were really little, she taught my sisters and me a few “fashion rules” to dress by. When we were old enough to pick out our own outfits, she guided us with these principles:
Don’t mix patterns.
If you are wearing a floral top, don’t choose polka dot pants.
Choose colors that either match or coordinate.
If you are wearing a Mickey Mouse graphic tee, choose a pair of pants that matches one of the exact colors on the tee or one that complements the color palette. More on this one later.
Don’t wear white in the winter.
Go for beige.
Choose colors that complement your features—hair, eyes, skin tone.
I’ve never done the whole color analysis thing, but this is like a mild version of that.
And for the most part, those principles have stuck with me. Especially #1 and #2. I think about those every time I get dressed. I suppose at this point I should mention that there aren’t really any rules for style. Some fashion gurus think there are, and others will tell you most of it boils down to opinions.
I’ll also point out that fashion and style are not synonymous. Fashion—what you see on the runway and trending in stores is “in,” and then it’s “out”. It’s seasonal. It’s more like art. Style, on the other hand, transcends the decades. It’s about combining, reworking, and rewearing. It’s individualistic. Fashion tells you what looks good. Style is what you decide looks good. It’s personal.
So with that said, I’ll clarify my mom’s “fashion rules”.
#1 This is a fashion rule that was most prevalent in the mid-1900s. At the time, trends taught consumers to stick to one pattern. Of course, over the years, fashion designers broke this rule. Most designers mix patterns all the time in their designs. But I’ll be so for real with you. I don’t think it looks good. I always find it chaotic and overwhelming to look at. But some people own it and love it. Maximilists (the opposite of a minimalist) clash all the patterns—animal print with geometrics, florals with stripes, plaids with polka dots, you name it. It’s a style for some people. But you’ll never catch me in an outfit like that. Which is why I still dress by this fashion rule, whether it’s a real one or not.
#2 This rule ventures into color theory a bit. If you are going for more of a minimalist style, this is where you find your happy place. Colors that are pleasing to the eye because they match or coordinate. I think color matching can pretty much go unexplained. Coordinating colors is a bit more nuanced, though. Let’s take a look at a color wheel.
In color theory terms, colors that are next to each other on the wheel are analogous. Colors that are across from each other are complementary. That’s where you find color coordination. Finding colors that coordinate takes into account tone and shade, as well. For example, I have a top in the blue-violet color and a pair of pants in the red-orange color. They certainly don’t match, but because of their similar tone, they look good together.
This topic is definitely a can of worms. For me, when I’m putting an outfit together, I hold the two colors up to each other and go with a gut feeling. Sometimes it just looks like it works. Other times, something seems off about it. And of course, I grew up with a professional color coordinator for a mom, so I frequently ask her what she thinks. ;)
#3 Yes, sometimes I wear white in winter. This fashion rule is mostly outdated and no longer relevant. It was formed in the mid-20th century for a combination of social, climate, and etiquette reasons. During that time period, fashion magazines and etiquette columns like Vogue helped spread the idea that white belonged to summer and darker colors to fall/winter. If you dress seasonally, you’ll notice colors like terracotta, burgundy, and forest green in stores during the fall and colors like lavender, butter yellow, and baby blue being sold in the spring. In terms of the white for summer and not winter idea, it wasn’t necessarily one designer who created the rule, but more of a fluid concept that has lost its validity over the decades. This rule can be more of a guide for seasonal style if that’s something you’re interested in. But if not, more power to ya to wear your favorite color year-round.
#4 I’m not sure if it’s a blue eyes and red hair person thing, but I do take my features into account whenever I’m shopping. My favorite color does happen to be blue, but besides that, I think there is a ton of blue in my closet because I have blue eyes. If you’re not sure what colors suit you best, think back to the clothes you’ve worn when you’ve received a compliment. Did someone like your top because it made your eyes pop? And in you’re interested, I’ve heard even ChatGPT can do color analysis now. I might check that out myself!
Those are the fashion rules I grew up with. However, in the last year, my style guidelines grew a bit. I started a board on my Pinterest to get some inspiration. In my idle time, I’d scroll and pin outfit ideas that mostly contained items I already had in my closet. I used to pin things I thought were super cute because of the one statement piece the outfit featured. But the issue with saving those ideas was that I didn’t have that statement piece. And without it, the outfit wasn’t possible. Here are some examples of outfits I saw on Pinterest that I recreated using the versions of pieces I had already.
As you can see, not all of them are exact copies of the inspo. But that’s where you learn to work with what you have! I’ll leave you with a couple more nuggets of style guidance before signing off.
Here’s what I’ve added recently:
Pay attention to the neckline of your top when deciding how to style your hair. And yes, style your hair! It adds SO MUCH to an outfit! It might sound a little silly, but to encourage myself to style my hair more, I created a little rule. I only allow myself to wear my hair down straight once a week. Notice in the pictures above, my hairstyles aren’t complicated. Sometimes, an outfit looks way better with a ponytail or a half-up, half-down.
Have a couple go-to hair styles that are quick and easy and give you a variety of options between hair down, half up, and fully up.
1. ACCESSORIZE. ALWAYS.
Seriously. Accessories make an outfit. You might be wearing a white t-shirt and jeans. Not a fit. Add a necklace, some statement earrings, rings, a hair scarf, and a cute pair of sunglasses? Now that’s a fit. See the difference here?
2. Work with layers.
This is a lot easier in the winter/colder seasons, but it’s possible in the summer too. Layers add another dimension to your outfit that makes it look more interesting. It might be as small as a high-neck shirt poking through a sweater or a long-sleeve shirt under a sleeveless top.
Well, I hope this was helpful/fun to read! I’m still discovering my style. It’s an ongoing process for sure. But hopefully there’s a piece or two of what I shared that helps you find yours!
As always, remember, you are loved by God, wonderfully made, and beautifully you. Don’t let someone else’s voice speak louder than what’s true.
Until next time…
hugs,
Kylie
