When a “no” really hurts…

The other day, I received a “no” that really hurt. A door to one of my dreams temporarily closed.

When I submitted my audition video a couple of weeks ago, I battled the pessimism rising inside of me. Part of me felt sure there was no way I’d make it. But my hope and trust in God kept this dream afloat.

I didn’t know what the outcome would be, but as I asked God to prepare my heart for the answer, I already felt like I knew. I wanted so badly to be surprised. But the outcome was what I expected. A “no”. 

The rest of that day, I was really sad. I had a good, long cry. I let myself feel the heavy emotions. I let myself mourn this delayed dream. But I knew at the end of that day, I was going to move on. I was going to choose to give it to God. I was going to make the last words on my lips before I fell asleep be songs of praise.

And the next morning, when I awoke, I was okay. 

Prior to submitting my audition video, I wrote my future-post-audition-self a letter. I wrote about the wonderful year 2026 was going to be, regardless of whether or not I achieved my dream. I reminded myself of the other dreams on my list—dreams that have been waiting for me to pick them up and begin. I wrote about the incredible things 2026 still had in store—a friend getting married, a sister graduating, and a family trip to my favorite place. 

If I let myself, I can spiral hard and fast into a really sad place. I can all too easily give the enemy the reins to wreak havoc in my mind—twisting my reality into a lie. I’m hesitant to even give a few examples of how the enemy could use this rejection against me because I’m standing so firm in protecting my mind from going there. 

Some moments are absolutely harder than others. But I want to choose joy. I want to choose God’s plan over mine. I don’t want to focus on a path He turned me away from. I want to set my sights on what’s ahead—what could be rather than what could’ve been. 

These next few weeks, while I continue to process this recent “no”, I’ll keep gratitude on my mind and praise in my heart. When my mind starts to wander into the danger zone—self-deprecation, comparison, self-consciousness—I’ll take a step back and thank God for exactly where I am. Even while my heart doesn’t understand it, this “no” will be a good thing. 

And the reason why this is so important to me is because my ultimate dream, the thing I truly want the most, is to follow God’s plan for me. I want to do what He wants me to do. I want to live out the dreams that are aligned with His will. When I struggle with a closed door, this desire is what keeps me planted. 

It is absolutely terrible to be rejected. It’s so painful to be told “no” for something you really, really want. With that said, if you also received a bit of rejection recently, I want to leave you with this. It’s a little piece of the letter I wrote to my future-post-audition-self, a bit of encouragement for finding the in-between. Your sadness and trust in God are allowed to coexist. 

Dear Kylie girl,

I am so proud of you. You danced fully and with every ounce you could.

And now that auditions have passed, I’m sure there is more swirling in your head than you thought there’d be.

Isn’t it wild how fast one year went by? I remember receiving this “no” for the first time in 2025. I felt so disappointed and overcome with sadness. At the time, one year felt like a long time to wait—a long time to train just to try again. 

But you did. You spent a whole year—week after week—in the dance studio, getting a little better every time. 

There were hard classes and discouraging ones. But there were so, so many fun ones.

You kept showing up. Even when you didn’t feel like it. And you had grace for yourself along the way. Even if you are reading this and you didn’t make it, I am so proud of you. I know it hurts right now. It’s ok to be sad. And it’s ok that other people know you are sad too. 

God doesn’t want to see your heart hurt. He uses everything for a purpose—even your tears. 

2025 was a beautiful reminder that it will be okay. If your dream is delayed another year, it will be okay. If you have to wait a little longer, it will be okay. There is so much more life to live and joy to find in unexpected places. 

Isn’t it so good that your loving Father knows what is best for you? He knows the perfect time and the perfect year. He knows the perfect place and the perfect people to share it with.

He knows when you will be ready. My prayer is that your dreams won’t be placed in your hands until you are. And that everything you do will bring you closer to Christ. If something requires you to pray, requires you to depend wholeheartedly on your Creator, it’s a fantastic use of time. 

May your dreams continue to be unattainable without God’s intercession. May your dreams only be granted if they align with God’s will.

This dream is attainable. You are capable. Remain humble. Give God the glory. Press on. You were made to do hard things. You’ll keep overcoming hard things for the rest of your life.

While tears may run down your cheeks, you can smile. While sadness and grief linger, your heart can stand firm, trusting God’s plan. I’m sorry. I know it’s hard to receive a “no”. It sucks. And if it takes you some time to get back on your feet, that’s ok too. Continue to have grace for yourself. And when you are ready, begin looking for what God is going to do instead. Let the Holy Spirit stir in your heart. Start a new dream. Learn something you’ve always wanted to try. Help your family. Listen enthusiastically. Be patient. Call your sister. Text your friend. Walk outside. And be in wonder of how incredible your good, good God is.

This is going to be an amazing year, regardless. 

If this resonates with you, then to us, I’d say, Congratulations. We went for a big dream. Let’s do it again. 

Remember, you are loved by God, wonderfully made, and beautifully you. Don’t let someone else’s voice speak louder than what’s true.

Until next time…

hugs,

Kylie